Renia Spiegel’s Diary III

All I can say–selfish and immature though it sounds–with whom I share a special friendship like Renia shared with her beloved Zygu. For years after her death, Zygu could not part with the diary, keeping a photocopied version of it as a shroud in his basement, writing his notes back to his beloved,

Another month of May is coming, the month of love… Today is 23 April 1989. I’m with Renusia’s sister–Jarusia. This blood link is all I have left. It’s been 47 years since I have lost Renusia. When I think after about her, I feel so small and unimportant. I owe her so much. Thanks to Renia I fell in love for the first time in my life, deeply and sincerely. And I was loved back by her in an extraordinary, unearthly, incredibly passionate way. It was an amazing, delicate emotion. our love grew and developed thanks to her. And it will never change until the end… [Zygmunt]

Despite its tragic end, this is the perfect book to read when you are in love. I ought to know: I am in love with my Zygmunt. His name is Vlad. He is everything a “tall, dark, and handsome” can be and more: he has a genuinely honest and brave heart. When I look at him I see “everything I want to be.” And I will include the words of Renia’s after “God saved Zygu”:

June night

pregnant

with dense darkness

night… stretches

above my head.

Night of solitude

Came. The irresistible one stood

at the end of the bed

with a tormenting face

dug its claws

into the sticky brain

and I dream…

My naked thoughts

stripped of clothing

stretch under my skull

in silence

and for mercilessly long

the night goes on.

Heavy black shroud

dropped and clings

to the body

silent and stubborn

I shuddered.

The flower opens

in quid

open lips

whisper words

fragrance of jasmine

of maturing buds.

Moan

exasperating slowly easing

sense sigh with relief

sweet fantasy

Dawn…

I hope that unlike Renia my love’s sun turns out to be a rising and not a setting sun.

Published by hadassahalderson

I am a professional author who lives in Wichita, KS. I went to Friends University and spent one year at Claremont Graduate University. My published work includes: The Bible According to Eve I-IV and Faust in Love.

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